ML - Boston Common

2014 - Issue 2 - Late Spring

Boston Common - Niche Media - A side of Boston that's anything but common.

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ILLUSTRATION BY DANIEL O'LEARY I t's Mother's Day on May 11 and I, for one, wish Sheryl Sandberg could "lean in" about that. I want her to weigh in on what it means to be a mod- ern mother, which on a good day means having it all and on a bad day means screwing it all up. Surely you have heard of Sandberg—she's the Harvard Business School guru and Facebook honcho who has inspired women to climb the corpo- rate ladder with aplomb, teaching us how to embrace risk, negotiate effectively, and communicate authentically. How's this for communicating authentically? I think some moms out there stink more than a dirty diaper. I think the parenting playground is more toxic than any highfalutin' boardroom. It may be a jungle out there, but the jungle gym is way more dangerous. When their little puddings aren't looking, moms are taking aim—at each other! First, there are the neighborhood factions. Here's a random sampler: Swellesley Wellesley lives up to its name—the moms are a breed all to them- selves. I should know. I am one. You can't go to Roche Bros. without your hair blown out, wearing Lululemon and maybe your daughter's Hunter wellies. The Newton Moms, just next door, start plotting and scheming to get their kids into Harvard or Yale from the day the little geniuses are born. If you're a Newton mom, you really ought to be married to a doctor to fit in. Have you noticed how many 'ologists live there? Oncologists, cardiolo- gists, nephrologists? It's a great place to get sick. Then there are the Stoneham Moms. In this town, you are a cop, a fireman, or a teacher, and you'd better marry each other or you'll get yelled at. Little-league play-off games require police detail. They are a loud bunch. (My mom was one, so I know firsthand.) If Wellesley, Newton, and Stoneham moms were in the sandbox together, there would be a lot of judging going on. The Newton mom would be telling the Stoneham mom her kid will never get into Harvard since he's 3 and still drinking from a sippy cup. The Stoneham mom will yell at her so forcefully that it will cause a sudden gust to mess up the Wellesley mom's blown-out coif. But if they practiced the Scriptures of Sheryl, which they all preach when they're at work, it would never have escalated like this. Instead of compet- ing with each other, they'd simply focus on the goals they'd set for themselves and their children—then work together to make them happen. They'd hold hands and say, "We must stop striving for perfection. We must trade in anger for love." And they might even mean it. Some women find Sandberg so inspiring they want her to be president of the United States. I'll settle for president of the playground. Wean in, mamas. BC Wean In FORGET THE WORKPLACETHE BOSTON PARENTING WORLD NEEDS SOME SERIOUS SELFHELP. BY SUE BRADY 128 BOSTONCOMMON-MAGAZINE.COM P arting Shot 128_BC_BOB_PartingShot_LateSpr14.indd 128 4/7/14 4:06 PM

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