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photography by seth olenick Love, Actually Online and Offline, Emily Romano nurtures single men and wOmen intO embracing the wild wOrld Of dating. by jim sullivan First , foremost , a nd above a ll, E m ily Roma no is not a matchma ker. She announces this emphatically over an Arctic iced coffee at a Coolidge Corner restaurant. "That's a misnomer that gets applied to me a lot," she says. Romano is an architect of romance, a resource for the reborn single looking for love in all the wrong first-date places, using unf lattering profile pictures to boot. It's a far cry from law school, where the North Reading native first staked her ground: "I hated everything about law. I dropped out." And dropped into the dating industry, where she discovered that, as Pat Benatar belted out, love is a battlefield. So Romano rolled up her sleeves and got to work. "Being single may be a symptom," she says, "but the problem may be you lack confidence, you don't feel comfortable talking to people. You're not getting out of your comfort zone." In 2012, she started Dateover, a dating consulting firm that coaches the lonely and lovelorn. Her goal is to groom clients—75 percent of whom are 40 -something divorcees— and educate them on the realities of Dating 2.0. "It's the sa me a s when you go to sell a product: You're going to present that product in the best way you can," she says. "W hile I think it's important to be genuine and honest, this is an opportunity to sell yourself. You need to make yourself a commodity and position your brand. If you're going to be this new, vibrant person entering the dating market, you have to look the part." Ty pica lly, Roma no meet s w it h a new client for t wo hours to assess his or her personality, interests, and com- for t zones. A re you a n ext rover t or a n int rover t? Is a makeover and wardrobe overhaul necessary? Is a bar or a chess game your scene? From there, she proposes a form of attack: role-playing a mock date, writing a profile bio ("Don't write a book!"), or shooting a great profile photo ("It is worth the investment"). For the super-shy, Romano w ill even ser ve a s a cla ndest ine chaperone. "I ca n act almost like a wingwoman on a date." "I wa nted to update my look a s well a s my at t it ude," says Susan Altwater, a divorced client in her mid-50s who works in human resources. "Emily was a great coach and really gave exceptional attention to helping me with hair, makeup, online profile, clothing suggestions, and setting goals for helping me find time in my overscheduled life to date. She gave me a fresh start." Once A lt water a nd ot her Dateover client s g raduate, t hey ca n look for wa rd to Roma no's newest vent ure: Vat t r i, a n online resource t hat of fers mult iple apps for verifying your date's background. Says Romano, "It will be a technolog y t hat could help t housa nds of people." dateover.com BC INSIGHT: Yes to the dress: "I love the boutiques on Newbury Street—especially Lit and Bobbles & Lace. They're great because you won't see 12 other girls wearing the same dress as you!" First-date spots: "The ambience is arguably more important than the food. For younger clients, I recommend Empire, Lolita Cocina & Tequila Bar, Temazcal Tequila Cantina, or Sonsie because they all have a sexy vibe." Emily Romano brings the tools and tactics of 21st-century marketing to the dating world, where, she says, "You need to make yourself a commodity and position your brand." doing the do: "My go-to salon is Enzo & Co. on Newbury Street. Those guys are so talented and always make me feel like family when I'm there." picture perFect: "I refer people to photographer Lisa Richov because she helps them look unposed, which is key. You have maybe fve seconds to make an impression with a photo." 68 bostoncommon-magazine.com PEOPLE Talent Patrol